Semi Nude Photo Shoots and God in one blog

That's right bitchessss (and I mean that with love)...

This girl right here is taking her semi nude photos on Wednesday.

It's something I've always wanted to do but never found the courage, the money, or the body wasn't right.

I am 25 and my body is as good as it is going to get unless I start to starve myself. I am 5'2 average weight 102 pounds. After a weekend of dancing I am 99 lol.

I've been letting my bush grow so I can get a Brazilian wax the day before the shoot. I can't stand hair on my body so this has been a tough one for me. I went to the beach twice this weekend and had to try to pull off a string bikini with a bush.

I went in the water and after every wave I would stand hunched over holding my crotch like a little kid that had to pee.

If the pictures come out good maybe I will block out my face and put one up. BIG MAYBE.

Love life update: Fitness and I had our first real fight this weekend... over my way of handling the possibility of wanting to move to Florida if I don't get into the NYPD academy... and this is when I realized, I care for this doof more then I thought I did.

I had been training for an agility test I HAD to pass if I wanted to even be considered for the JULY NYPD class... I had taken this test and failed it before because I hadn't been working out as hard... the people there remembered me and were so supportive. I think a few of them were trying to flirt but FUCK IT- I was too nervous to care.

As I began the test I thought I was going to take a shit in my sweats. I paced myself to make sure I didn't exhaust myself for the next stage (it was 6 stations- a 6 foot fence climb, a stairs section, pulling and pushing 80 pounds of force, a short jog, a 180 pound dummy pull, and a trigger test- shoot 16 times each hand... sounds easier then it is).

I PASSED.

I really want this. I feel cheated out of this experience, I was suppose to get in January and the mayor decided to make cuts. I have my feelings about this but I will not bad mouth political figures on my blog. I know a few people who are on the job just for the benefits, this is what I want to do, I love criminal justice. I swear, it is my calling.

Fitness tells me he prays for me everyday because he can tell- it is affecting me, the possibility of not getting in. I've cried alone at the thought. I've literally put my life on hold in hopes of getting in this class.

Pang's sorority sister tells me she is praying for me. I am flattered so many people are praying for me to get what I want. She recommends I go to church and pray too.

I haven't been to church since Sept 12, 2001.

I decide, I'M GOING TO CHURCH.

So I make my way. There are 3 big entrances.
I try one, it is locked.
I try the second one, it is locked.
I try the third one, it is locked.
I stand on the stoop of the church and stare these doors down for about one minute.
I suck my teeth, I AM GOING TO PRAY AND NO LOCKED DOORS ARE GOING TO STOP ME. I sat down on the stoop of the church, bowed my head and spoke to God... I hope he heard me over the noise of New York streets.